Guess What Happened Today?: Math...Beautiful Math...Huh, Who Said That?

I love numbers. My grade 10 math teacher, Mr. Brunetti would flip his lid if he heard me say that. He gave me a 59 at the end of the first term, and wrote three words on my report card that I’ll never forget…”It’s a struggle.” He was right. It was a struggle. I struggled to come to his class everyday and sit there and learn about Pythagoras and his tricky little theorem. I struggled to understand the importance of tangents and cosines. I struggled to understand when and how knowing that to calculate the area of a circle it’s Pi R squared. WTF. Who needs to know that?

I'm grateful that somebody knows how to calculate the area of a circle...but it doesn't have to be me.

Maybe it’s really data that I love. It’s not the numbers so much as the story they tell. Once I got to work and understood that numbers tell stories and that they’re clues to other things, math became much less of a struggle for me. Numbers became the basis of P&L statements, budgets, marketing plans, compensation plans. They are clearly the foundation on which business is built, and on which it survives. Now that’s a story that I don’t have to struggle so much with.

You can't love me, Data, but I sure love you.

As a father, I find myself trying to explain why fractions and algebra are important to my thirteen year old. The only thing I can tell her is that without really thinking about it, I use math every single day. Now, to be certain, I’m not measuring the angles of isosceles triangles, but every day, it’s math, math, math. And some days, it’s still a struggle. Damn you, Brunetti.

Algebra humour. Who knew?

I was helping Haley with her algebra homework yesterday (flip, Brunetti, flip!), and I was surprised how fast it came back (after a little traipse through the interweb). Crap, if we would have had the internet when I was in grade 10, it sure wouldn’t have been so much of a struggle. So, the ease at which simple algebra came back to me leads me to believe that there must be some application of algebra in my day-to-day life. Then it struck me…every day at work, we solve for x. Clearly, I’m now an algebra freak! I had a boss once that said to me, “…it’s all ones and zeroes…” in some lame geeky reference to binary code. Who knew that work would be all about binary code and solving for freaking X. I would have paid more attention. Turns out, again, those ones and zeroes and x’s and y’s tell the story. Like most things, it comes down to the data…and more importantly, what it’s telling you.

Can life really be reduced to a series of ones and zeroes?

X=223,412. That’s the current balance in my frequent flier account. The last time I shared the balance with you, it was 100,240, almost exactly one year ago today. In one year my balance has more than doubled (wish I could say that about my retirement account). To use a math term, the delta (that's math-speak for 'change') is about 123,000 miles. So what does that data tell us? First, that I travel too freakin’ much. Second, that I’m pretty loyal to Air Canada (many wouldn’t be, but I am), and third, that I’m chasing status (you know how much my Elite status means to me, and I’m on track to hit Super Elite this year).

Where you gonna go with all those miles?

Here’s what I learned about 223,412 Air Canada frequent flier miles. You would think that I could travel the globe for free on 223,412 miles. Not so fast, sport. I thought that a nice trip to Europe would be just the ticket for my family, who has, for the most part, taken my crazy travel schedule in stride without complaining. So I dialed up Air Canada on the world wide web and started the travel planning. I found 5 flights that took us to Paris, and returned us to Toronto via Dublin. It took some figuring and playing with dates and times to make it all happen, but I did it. 5 flights in my shopping cart. Success? Not so much.

We were gonna be the Griswalds. Hmmph.

“Click to go to next step” are words that would make you think you’re making progress, right? That in the next step you’re going to be printing off tickets for your most awesome family trip. Wrong again, sport. This is the point where you pay the fees and taxes for your free trip. $4,873.00. For free f***ing tickets. As it turns out, although you get the seat for free, you still need to pay for the gas. Thank you, Mr. Slater for your loyalty to our airline, just deposit five grand and we’ll send you some free tickets. #FAIL. (That’s a twitter term for something that blows.) No tix to Europe for us. I expected to pay some security tax, but I didn’t think I’d be personally responsible for funding the Eurozone Bailout. X=WTF?

Greek Rioters, or other people trying to book free flights on Air Canada?

502. 89. 17. That’s the number of connections I have on Linkedin, the number of friends I have on Facebook, and the pitiful number of people who feel like I have anything of any value to contribute to the Twitterverse. Now, you’ll recall that I set myself a goal earlier this year to exceed 500 Linkedin connections, only people I know, and I achieved it last week. It was a sadly exciting moment. I mean, what does that data tell you? It tells you that of all the social media programs, I’m most addicted to Linkedin. Between you and me, I’m as addicted to Linkedin as I am to that bloody flashing red light on my blackberry. Don’t even get me started. And for crying out loud, Sarah Palin has 843,345 twitter followers and she hasn’t said anything good for like, ever.

Yep...this is how Sarah chooses to use her national soapbox...

23. That’s how many frequent flier, car rental loyalty, and frequent guest programs I belong to. Because I’m loyal to Air Canada and Marriott, I carry around 21 cards in my wallet that I never take out. It’s no wonder my lower back hurts on one side and I walk with a limp. It hurts to sit on my big ass wallet. Of the dozen or so other hotel programs that I belong to, I’m sure I don’t have enough points between them to get one free night at a Motel 6. Westjet keeps sending me an email with an update to my Westjet Dollars account. X=1. One Westjet dollar. I don’t even know how you get one Westjet dollar. Clearly a pity buck.

Click here to see George's exploding wallet in action. That's how I feel.

153,553. That’s the number of points I have in my Marriott account. With those points, I can actually go somewhere. I can have a week or more in almost any city where Marriott has a property. It may not be their top of the line brand, but I can go. And free means free. I can have a week in Hawaii, or the Caribbean, or in most European cities on my points alone. No cash top-ups, fees, or additional taxes.. Those points were going to take care of the accommodation part of the family holiday to Europe. Marriott was going to stand by me, as I have by them, night after night of business traveling. They were going to be my family’s home away from home on a vacation of a lifetime. Until the whole thing got nixed. Foiled again by Air Canada. Usually they give me gas. Now they want it back. Five grand worth.