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Is it just me, or is there hilarious shit happening everywhere? The blog used to be about work. Now it's about life.

Friday 17 May 2013

So Long, Farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, Adieu...

Someone once said that parting is such sweet sorrow.  I don’t know about sweet, but there’s certainly lots of sorrow.  I’ve known it was coming for quite some time, but it finally happened yesterday.  I said good bye to a dear, dear friend forever.  It’s officially the end of my relationship with my blackberry, and I’m going to miss it.

Many people have said that I should give it a week with my new phone and I’ll forget all about my blackberry.  They say that the iPhone is so much more in so many ways, but I just can’t see it.  I’ve entered the withdrawal stage, and it’s not pleasant.  I’m so programmed to feel that little red light, it's like my pulse, and as if attached to one of those heart monitors in the hospital, my little red pulse has stopped blinking. Flatlined. Forever. 



My first blackberry was made of stone.  It weighed about 6 pounds, and you couldn’t break it.  It came with a hard plastic holster, and in those days, wearing your blackberry on your hip like a six shooter was super cool.  I had that blackberry for a number of years, until the metal frame around the screen came loose and started to scratch up my face.  That was the first time in my life that technology started fighting back.  With your black plastic holster that clicked every time you moved it around, the world knew that you were awesome.  That things were happening in your life that you couldn’t be separated from for even one minute.  I was always anal about what was happening at work when I wasn't there, and now, finally, I had something that allowed me to take the edge off that terrible stress.  

Then I met Curve. I never loved you and you never loved me, but like all good couples, we powered through.  I never wanted anything bad to happen to you, but I sure wasn’t sad when your little nasty trackball fell out.  What made me sad was that it was a condition that could be fixed.  Our relationship after that was touch and go until you mysteriously got dropped into the toilet.  Sayonara, Curve !


Oh Curvy, you almost caused me to fall out of love with Blackberry
Then came the Bold.  You, I loved.  Maybe I loved you because you weren’t a Curve.  I loved you because you didn’t have the stupid trackball, but rather, a sleek and sexy trackpad.  The plasticky curve you were not…you had some presence…you were so, I don't know, bold!  Where I didn’t really care what happened to my Curve, I was devastated when, as I was climbing out a window onto my roof, your beautiful brilliant screen was pierced by a nail.  Sad on one hand, but on another, the nail pierced you and not my leg.  You may have saved me from a horrific tetanus shot (for a big boy, I’m unnaturally afraid of needles). I was sad to see you go.

Good-bye Bold, Hello World.  Blackberry World Phone, that is.  You came to me when I started a job that, thankfully, wasn’t long-lived, and frankly, I wasn’t sad to see either one of you go.  You may have had the ability to connect me to the world if I had decided to trek through Botswana, but you were missing some important stuff.  Once you’ve had a camera on your phone, it’s pretty hard to go camera-less, and If I've got a phone that lets me travel the world, I probably want to snap the odd picutre. I know it’s silly, but you just get used to having it there.

And the best came last.  Ahhh, the Torch.  Lots of folks disagree with me, but I have loved my Torch since the moment I laid hands on it.  It has presence and it has weight, but not too much weight.  It fits my hand beautifully, and I like how it looks.  A lot.  We’ve been together for over two years, and with the exception of sometimes giving me some attitude, and occasionally going to sleep when it’s not supposed to, I've loved it.  For two years we’ve been inseparable.  We’ve been from one end of this country to the other more times than I can count and we’ve pretty much covered the continent together.  You’ve been my only lifeline to my family when I’ve been away and lonely, you’ve kept work information flowing like digital intravenous, and you’ve kept me company when I’ve been stranded in airports and train stations, and even on the side of the road.  



I'd like to think my blackberry is going to be sad to lose me too.

I always said I’d never give you up, and here I am, giving you up.  I feel like I’ve let you down, when you’ve never let me down, not even for one second.  It's true...when your red light was extinguished for the very last time yesterday I felt sad.  Genuinely sad.  I’m about 22 hours into life without my blinking red light, and I feel lost without it.

Thank you Blackberry for always being there for me.  I’m going to miss you.